Yesterday was a complete and total bust for me as far as climbing went, but that’s about what I expected. I still preferred climbing to spending the day driving back from Salt Lake City, which was my other option, which would have meant sacrificing another day or two to post-driving, post-O.R. Show exhaustion. In any case, it was a strange sort of tiredness, one that started with my brain feeling fuzzy and unfocused, which meant all operating systems just weren’t working quite right. I had no core tension; I just couldn’t pick my feet up effectively. I cut the day short because of this, but again, felt zero frustration…and what a refreshing change this has been.
Letting go of feelings of frustration related to rock climbing performance has freed up my mind and energy to completely immerse myself in the process of climbing and training for climbing without expectations or any negativity. Since I’m doing all that I can to send this route, including eating well, training well, and making every effort sleep well, I realize that there’s absolutely no reason to feel negative, discouraged, or irritated by the process it takes and the time required. To do so is only to hinder my own progress by feeding my body the message that it’s not good enough, thereby disturbing my inner sense of balance and wellbeing.
Though this makes complete and logical sense, I really haven’t experienced this total lack of feeling upset or frustrated by rock climbing ever before for such an extended period of time. In years past, I’ve been moody and up and down, instead of maintaining a more productive state of steady contentment while always striving to get stronger and improve myself. Now, I see through this silliness to a better way to be, and it leads to a sense of peace and self-acceptance, a calm way of being through every day in the process on whatever climb I’m trying to complete. Being this way saves so much more energy to invest in the climbing itself, too, which is where I really want my energy to be.